A follow up to yesterday’s post about taking a mean one, the sheriff has now recommended that charges be filed against the boyfriend of the woman that was stuck on the toilet for 2 years. Sheriff recommends charge in toilet case.

Now I agree the man could have done more and done it sooner, but to charge him with mistreatment of a dependent adult? That seems a bit much. I have not heard anything in regard to the woman’s mental or physical capacities other then being attached to the toilet and having reported phobia of leaving the bathroom. I take that to mean prior to sitting on the toilet seat she was a fully functioning adult capable of making her own decisions. So how then did the boyfriend mistreat her? He provided her with food and water, tried to get her to leave the bathroom repeatedly but gave in to her wish to remain where she was.

I almost got into a heated debate with my sister over this today. Mostly because she tends to not be so open minded and seems to take offense just because I have a differing opinion (I am an adult and I can choose to say please or thank you if I want to show poor manners or not and I can choose to leave less of a tip for substandard service and not feel bad about it, but I digress). She tried to argue that he should have known better and that it is just not right and that he should have done something more to get her out of the bathroom sooner, because she certainly wouldn’t let someone stay in the bathroom for that long, let alone more then an hour or two. To which my reply was well you are not him. You do not know the man, you do not know the relationship they had, or how he treated her. Perhaps he is the sort of man that always gives in to what his woman wants and never pushes the matter. Perhaps he has a mental condition as well. And I would argue that he was treating her better then someone else would have. If this had gone the other way and he broke her arm getting her out of the bathroom he would be arrested for assault, instead he took the extremely passive side and may end up being charged with mistreatment of a dependant adult.

A related cnn article, Boyfriend: Phobia caused woman’s 2-year bathroom stay, the boyfriend reportedly said:

“She is an adult; she made her own decision,” said her boyfriend, Kory McFarren.
“I should have gotten help for her sooner; I admit that. But after a while, you kind of get used to it.”

The article also goes on to say:

But McFarren said she moved around in the bathroom during that time,
bathed and changed into the clothes he brought her. He brought food and water to her.
They had conversations and had an otherwise normal relationship — except it all happened in the bathroom.

So far it seems like the boyfriend did everything the woman wanted. He kept her happy, let her stay in the bathroom, fed her, gave her water. They had a normal relationship (other then it taking place in the bathroom that is). He finally called police because she had started acting groggy, not knowing what was going on, even though she was awake. Seems like he kept pretty good tabs on her and knew her rather well.

The woman was not forced to stay in the bathroom. In fact she initially refused the help when it arrived. Eventually she was convinced by responders AND HER BOYFRIEND.

Is the boyfriend guilty of mistreatment? Hell no. And unless new evidence comes out that he somehow forced or coerced her to stay in the bathroom, i doubt you will be able to convince me otherwise. Is he stupid and probably spineless? Hell yes. He most certainly should have done something sooner and gotten help sooner. He should have had the back bone to do what was right instead of what she wanted. Should he be charged with mistreatment of a dependant adult? Only if you start charging everyone that has a friend or relative that is an alcoholic or drug addict or chooses to do some other crazy stupid thing. Perhaps managers of extreme sports athletes should all be charged as well.