Chuck NorrisChuck Norris Facts are not new. But now there is a makeshift shrine to Chuck Norris at a U.S. military helicopter hub in Baghdad. The fact that Chuck Norris supports the US troops is the only proof we need that the war in Iraq is justified.

I especially like the quote at the end by Khaled Hussein, whom I am assuming is a member of the police force in Iraq:

“I’ve seen his videos, he’s a hero. He saves the city, he protects women and children and he fights crime wherever it is. We should all be like Chuck Norris,”

The one thing I disagree with his calling him a mythical legend. When he is actually a factual legend, there is no myth about him.

So for those wondering what is so great about Chuck Norris here are a few Chuck Norris facts (go ahead, I dare you to dispute them, just know that Chuck Norris heard you say that and his fist has already hit your face)

  • The fastest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’s fist.
  • Chuck Norris puts the laughter in manslaughter.
  • Chuck Norris divides by zero
  • If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money then you.
  • There is no ‘ctrl’ button on Chuck Norris’s computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
  • Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
  • Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s potato chip.
  • Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
  • Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
  • Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.